An Early Red Sox Post Mortem

Well, the All-Star Game will be played at Target Field tomorrow night, and although the game is the ceremonial halfway point, the timing is right to do a post mortem on the Red Sox season. Some may call me fair-weathered, but at 43-52, 9.5 games out of first place, and showing few signs of going on a tear, I have little hope I will be enjoying October baseball as much as I did last year.

Not all the news is bad.  The Red Sox made a solid start prior to the trade deadline by excising a clubhouse cancer; true addition by subtraction.

I believe Pierzynski is Polish for "peckerhead."

All the euphoria of the 2013 World Series run was tempered by the appearance of A.J. Pierzynski during the telecast of one of the games at Fenway.  There was already talk of Jarrod Saltalamacchia not re-signing with the Red Sox, and seeing AJ in the booth with little reason brought a foreboding sense of doom. I eventually accepted the fact Salty wouldn't be with the Red Sox, but had hopes he would show up to my benefit.

Little time passed before I learned what I hope wouldn't happen, did. I still had some faith the Red Sox, a team of professionals, would be able to find a workaround to having AJ as the team's primary catcher. Other than Salty and Jacoby Ellsbury, most of the key players were returning. I chose to take a wait-and-see approach, but would have little patience if things turned sour.

The Red Sox have a lot of things to work on offensively that can't solely be blamed on Pierzynski. I do think a key component to a successful baseball team is having an established catcher. The Red Sox had Varitek for many years and were very successful when he was on the team. One of the worst seasons during his stint was when he was out with an injury. Saltalamacchia was acquired in 2010, survived the crash of 2011, the lost Valentine year of 2012, and was the primary catcher of 2013. When the Red Sox signed AJ, Ben Cherington should have announced 2014 was a bridge year, in spite of the fact the team would be defending World Champions.

My Spat With A Minor (Single-A) Celebrity

Pete Abraham is a troll, both in social media and in appearance.

I’ll admit I have enjoyed reading his “Extra Bases” blog on boston.com as he provides some good insight on the Red Sox and his summaries offer quick notes before each game.  However, there are times when Mr. Abraham has taken an attitude that chaps my ass and affects my overall opinion of him.

Here is the anatomy of these Pete Abraham posts:

Pete:  *Offers a series of stats that puts the team or a player in a bad light* 

Victim:  “Well, the team should do (X).” 

Pete:  “You’re stupid.  Look at these other facts I did not include in my original post, yet seem to have handy after you posted your silly response.” 

Victim:  “I’m not stupid.  You’re a hack!” 

Pete:  “No.  You are.”

The conversation starts to devolve from there; and woe onto those who use the improper version of ‘you’re.’

I had been annoyed when witnessing these baiting tactics, but my ass-chapping reached its zenith when I fell victim to them; hence the ease with which I made my earlier ad hominem attack.  In early August, Pete had tweeted where in the batting order Boston first baseman Mike Napoli had typically hit.  He ended the tweet saying the team was being patient with him.  I used this as an opportunity to ask if he felt Napoli would break Mark Bellhorn’s regular season team record for strikeouts.  Below is the exchange.

Now, I might be overly sensitive, but I felt Pete’s attitude was very dismissive; and he may have thought the view was “senseless,” but he used the word in an exchange with me, so I took it personally.  I probably didn’t use the best of baseball logic, considering I borrowed the “strikeout is the most unproductive of outs” from Tim McCarver, but if you dig through enough of his dirt, you can find some gems.  At any rate, Pete seemed uninterested in discussing Napoli’s strikeout total, until less than a week later he made this tweet:

WTF, Dude?!

Cape Cod Vacation: The Beginning

It's been about four years since the last time my Minnesota family and I traveled to the Cape for vacation, which is just enough time to develop a need to go again.  Personally, I like to go in early July to hopefully attend the Boston Harborfest, but G-Bug's birthday is on the second and her mother likes to celebrate with her.  This year, we also had to time the vacation just right to fit in between the various volleyball camps G-Bug was participating, so late July was the best time to go.  Mom was able to find a suitable cottage for 6 adults, a teenager, and 2 boys under 10 years old in Orleans.  The deposits and airfare were paid well in advance and it was just a matter of waiting for the week to arrive.

Unfortunately, I fell victim to one of the classic blunders.  The most famous of which is never get involved in a land war in Asia, but only slightly less well known is this:  never take a summer vacation when you work in the HVAC industry.  I requested the time off back in May which my boss approved with no issues.  The spring had been very mild for Minnesota and for many parts of the country, so we hadn't seen a lot of urgent issues arise for replacement air conditioning parts.  Murphy's law being what it is, the week leading up to my vacation was replete with urgent, hot, desperate issues with extreme heat in the Southwest and Northeast.  None of these areas are in my territory, but the Midwest finally got hot as well.  I was pretty sure I wouldn't be able to "just monitor" my work emails while on vacation, but would have to take an active role in delegating them to someone still in the office.  It looked like I would need this vacation more than ever.

The Wifey, G-Bug and I took separate planes to Boston.  I redeemed Delta miles to get a $5 ticket The Wifey used, while G-Bug and I booked the cheapest flight available with Sun Country Airlines.  We arrived within an hour of each other, The Wifey first, so she was able to grab a beer or two with my brother while they waited.  My brother typically doesn't need to have alcohol to be a schmuck, but once he has some, he can take it up a notch, as evidenced by this text exchange.

Me:  Waiting for our luggage at baggage claim #3.  Hasn't even started spinning yet.

Bro: Damn it my car is being towed!  You're on your own. 

Me:  I hope you're joking. 

Bro: Your blue shirt looks dumb, asshole. 

Bro: Yeah, keep chuckling, bitch. 

Me:  Show your bald head so I can slap it.  Or I'll have G-Bug kick your ass. 

Bro: Where's Waldo? 

Bro: You have no idea. 

Bro: By the way, what's with the sex jazz in here? 

Bro: You dumbasses! 

Bro: Looking the wrong way and shit! 

Bro: Should I fart?

Turns out my brother and The Wifey were hiding behind a pillar across from the baggage carousal.  I sent G-Bug to find them and when she had bird-dogged them, they walked over to where I was standing.  Once in range, I delivered on my promise to slap my brother on his bald head.

The walk from the terminal to where my brother parked his car seemed like a watered down version of the Bataan Death March; unpleasant, but survivable. We've had hot and humid days in Minnesota, but just not to a degree like THIS. Back at my brother's house, we chitchatted with his wife and kids.  His two boys are 9 (nearly) and 5, but were gracious enough to allow me to change the TV from cartoons to the Red Sox game.  It was the first game after the All-Star break and they were playing the hated Yankees, although the rivalry has lost its intensity. We ordered a couple pizzas and drank some beers as we watched the Red Sox squeak out a 4-2 win.  We started with a Samuel Adams summer ale, but then my brother introduced me to an interesting beer I hadn't had before.  It's called Kentucky Bourbon Barrel Ale and it was very strong with an alcohol content over 8% and matched the cask flavors of the bourbon aging process.  I really enjoyed it and hope I can find it in Minnesota.

The next morning we prepped for our trip to the Cape.  My brother's youngest had a swimming lesson in the morning and his wife had a tennis lesson.  We couldn't pick up the keys to the cottage until after 3p, but we had to be there before 5p, so we had a small window of opportunity.  Previous Cape vacations were spent in Eastham, Wellfleet, and Truro, which are part of the Outer (or Lower) Cape.  Orleans is included in this region, but it's the most southern, so it is considered "up Cape."  

At any rate, it wouldn't take us long to get to Orleans as it would the other places, so we weren't rushed as we packed up our cars.  As we did so, my brother treated us to something that has become a taste of New England for me - a dozen Dunkin Donuts.  

I realize DD can be found all over the US, but we don't have any in Minnesota.  I didn't think there were any in the Midwest until I saw one in Chicago.  I washed two donuts down with an iced coffee and the stress of the work week started to dissolve.  I couldn't wait to get on the road, mostly because I wanted to get the car's A/C going.  We were on our way in short order.

365 in 365: Images 133 through 139

This series of pictures shows what a lovely place Minnesota can be once the snow stops and the weather starts to warm.  The Red Sox came into town at the end of the week.  I was able to catch the middle game in the three game set.  Nothing like a baseball game to get you into the summer spirit.

No. 133:  05-13-2013

Without leaves on the trees, canoes racked and stacked by the lake
are the first sign of Spring

No. 134:  05-14-2013

Once the weather hits 60 degrees, the clothes start to come off.  
Spontaneous volleyball on Lake Calhoun

No. 135:  05-15-2013

Lake of the Isles without ice on it

No. 136:  05-16-2013 (placeholder)

On the left you can see the buildings of St. Paul.  As you follow
the tree line, you can see the buildings of Minneapolis

No. 137:  05-17-2013 (placeholder)

From the SRO area behind right field at Target Field

No. 138:  05-18-2013

If I had a baseball, I could have hit Daniel Nava; if I also had the
aim and arm strength.  Ironically, he hit a home run about 10 feet
from where I was standing.

No. 139:  05-19-2013 (placeholder)

A panoramic view of Target Field

Just Lackey Being Lackey

I was glad to see the Red Sox won today even though John Lackey was the pitcher of record.  I've never hidden the fact that I don't like Lackey.  I still believe he was the catalyst for the coup against Terry Francona that lead to the Red Sox collapse in 2011.  After Clemens, Beckett, and now Lackey, the Red Sox seem to love asshole pitchers from Texas.  They better keep a tight rein on Clay Buchholz and get rid of Lackey as a negative influence.

Before he joined the Red Sox, I never had an opinion about Lackey either way.  I knew he was considered a better than average pitcher, but when the Red Sox faced him, I remember them doing quite well.  Now that the Boston media can document his every move, the more I see and read, the less impressed I've become.

I watched Lackey's last start on TV against the Rays.  Even though he was staked a six run lead in the first inning, he was hit hard repeatedly and slowly started giving back the lead.  It's in those moments when the going gets tough that you get to see the true nature of a person.  During a particularly rough inning, the Rays were able to get a number of runners on base, the culmination of which was a bloop single that fell in front of Daniel Nava.  The replay showed Lackey shouting in frustration, perhaps at himself, but I think he was yelling at Nava for not getting to the ball.

Now Nava isn't a speed guy, but he hustles and plays a solid defense.  He isn't going to make diving plays, but he will keep a single from turning into a double or triple.  He's like Trot Nixon; a true Dirt Dog, and a potential All-Star.  There is no reason for his pitcher to be showing him up.

Later in the game, Lackey drilled Matt Joyce in the back.  Joyce had hit a home run and was demonstrative when he hit a long foul ball, just missing his second home run.  I saw the replay and it looked very much like he was disappointed in himself for missing a pitch.  He wasn't showboating in any way.

Even in his short stint with the Red Sox, Lackey has shown a history of hitting batters who he felt showed him up, and it probably goes back to his days with the Angels.  I remember a game in 2011 he pitched against the Yankees.  Lackey served up a meatball to Francisco Cervelli, a light-hitting catcher, that went over the Green Monster.  When Cervelli reached home plate, he appeared to hunch over and give one enthusiastic clap of his hands.  During the replay, the camera focused on Lackey and he was seen rubbing up a new baseball and glaring at the plate.  I could tell by the look on his face that he had decided to hit Cervelli during his next at bat.  Sure enough, he did.  What an asshole pitcher from Texas!

One other thing chapped my ass as I was watching the game.  It was televised on ESPN and one of the analysts was Aaron Boone.  The game had reached the late innings and Lackey had been relieved.  The camera had looked into the Red Sox dugout and showed all the players standing against the railing, watching the game.  To his credit, Lackey was there, too.  Boone took this opportunity to praise Lackey for showing that kind of sportsmanship and said he has always been that kind of player.  I call bullshit.  

I thought I had gotten over my anger at Aaron Boone when he hit that walk-off home run against Tim Wakefield in 2003, but that comment had rekindled my rage.  Aaron Fucking Boone!

John Lackey and the Red Sox Post Mortem

Before John Lackey was relegated to the permanent disabled list for 2012 with Tommy John surgery, I was hoping he would be traded to the Twins.  Not that I think he is the crafty veteran the Twins pitching staff needs as a leader, but I was imagining I could have a dozen or so home starts to show Lackey what I think of him.  My plan was to bring a half dozen signs, sit as close as possible behind the Twins dugout and be in his line of sight each time he came off the field.

1^st Inning – “Hey, Lackey!  Wanna beer?”

2^nd Inning – “Was that last pitch a spitball or chicken grease?”

3^rd Inning – “Lackey is named ‘Hoss’ cuz of his teeth.”

4^th Inning – “Lackey’s Ex survived 2 cancers:  breast & clubhouse”

5^th Inning – “I Hate John Lackey.” (I need to think of something more clever)

6^th Inning – “Made 6 signs cuz Lackey can’t go 7.”

Extra (when Gardenhire pulls Lackey after 5 1/3) – “See?  I told you!”

Obviously, there has been a never-ending stream of what the Red Sox need to do to improve the team for next year.  There have been more bad ideas than good, like blowing up the team and starting fresh or trading away prospects like Ryan Kalish and Will Middlebrooks for more established players.  I believe team chemistry stems from playing together for a long time.  Players who knew each other in the minors can reconnect in the majors and that builds unity.  One of the problems of the 2011 team was there were too many new parts.  However, I agree there are some players that need to go away.  After the jump, I give my take on many of the players on the roster.