We saved the best for last, which worked out well; otherwise we would have spent the rest of our trip recovering. I don’t think any of us had much of a hangover, but we did sleep into the late morning. Mike went downstairs and returned with three cups of coffee and a newspaper. The coffee was just what the doctor ordered. We eased into our day and took stock of what we still wanted to do while in Las Vegas. We had tickets to Anthony Cools and wanted to go to Coyote Ugly, which would take care of our evening. We felt baked from the intense heat of the past couple days, so we weren’t eager to sit by the pool. The European soccer championship was in the afternoon and since Rob and I had money on the game, we wanted to watch it. A foam party was scheduled in the Monte Carlo pool area starting at noon and lasting until six, which sounded like a lot of fun. We had a pretty big window to catch the party and figured we could stop by when we had some free time. We hadn’t done any souvenir shopping and we were leaving early tomorrow morning, so we decided to do that to get the day going.
We visited the local places, like Gameworks and the M&M store, across the street. We didn’t walk around for long before I started to feel a little light-headed, probably for not having breakfast after an alcohol-fueled night. We made our way over to the MGM Grand to visit the shop next to the lion’s cage. Inside the store, there was a window where people could view a lion cub being fed from a bottle. There was an older couple with a trainer in the room and I assumed they had paid for the experience. I also took the opportunity to redeem my $15 ticket I had from video poker on our first night in town.
The soccer game had an early start time for us on the West Coast, and just in time for lunch. We re-crossed the street to New York, New York and found a place with immediate seating at the Nine Fine Irishmen. Barcelona was well represented in the bar, but the table we sat was in an area where most people were cheering Manchester United. We had lunch and Sam Adams while we watched the game. It became pretty obvious that Man U was out-matched in talent, but the score was tied 1-1 at the half. I knew if Man U had a chance to win the game, the final score would have to be 2-1. When Barcelona scored its second goal, my hopes faded. When Barcelona scored its third goal, they evaporated. At least I waited until the official end of the game before tearing up my ticket. Mike paid for lunch and we headed outside.
The weather was hot as blazes again and we just didn't have the energy to find something else to do. The foam party had already started and we decided to check out the action. We went upstairs first to drop off the shopping bags in our room. From there, we had an excellent vantage point of the goings-on in the pool area. Two inflatable pools were set-up in the volleyball sandbox where the foam machine was located. I don't know what the intent was, whether the foam would be confined to the pools or be allowed to spread, but the high winds of that day made the foam float skyward and disappear. In spite of the disappointing foam showing, there was a big crowd and we went to join it.
The weather was hot as blazes again and we just didn't have the energy to find something else to do. The foam party had already started and we decided to check out the action. We went upstairs first to drop off the shopping bags in our room. From there, we had an excellent vantage point of the goings-on in the pool area. Two inflatable pools were set-up in the volleyball sandbox where the foam machine was located. I don't know what the intent was, whether the foam would be confined to the pools or be allowed to spread, but the high winds of that day made the foam float skyward and disappear. In spite of the disappointing foam showing, there was a big crowd and we went to join it.
Rob, Mike and I are devoted, honorable married men, but there was a slew of Grade A talent on display. As we wandered around the pool area, I began to feel my 40+ years. I suppose I should think of myself as 21 with nineteen years of experience, but no. I have to assume the others felt the same way as Rob’s 40th was in April (the purpose of our trip) and Mike is almost a year and a half away from the big 4-0. There was nothing else to do but drown our sorrows. I gave Mike a fiver to pay for a can of Bud Light Lime for me. We stood to the side, drank our beers, and enjoyed the bacchanalia playing out in front of us.
After our drinks, Rob went back to the room to rest up for our evening. Mike and I stayed in the pool area and found a couple chairs in the old folks section. Amazingly, also in this section was a very slender woman wearing a very revealing bikini who was accompanied by an entourage. She drew the attention of a bachelor party that had rented a nearby cabana. They asked her to join them for some photos and not only did she oblige, she showed some professional level skill at posing and lap-dancing. I made the comment that she must be a porn star, and Mike sarcastically added, “Yeah, I think I recognize her ass from ‘Anal Intruders 20.’” I don’t know if there is such a franchise with so many sequels (the double entendre of ‘XX’ is too great to miss), but I want to offer Mike some brotherly advice – CLEAR YOUR BROWSER HISTORY!
Mike and I started to feel the effects of the last couple days after a short time and we headed upstairs to rest up, clean up, and dress up. When we returned to New York, New York, we were some of the first people waiting in line to get into Coyote Ugly. Once the doors finally opened at a quarter past 6p, I took a look around, which didn’t take long. The bar was essentially one large dance floor bordered on two sides by bars. Only one was open and serving drinks at the time. To the left of the doors were some stools and a narrow wooden shelf that ran the length of the wall where people could place their drinks. There was a punching bag game in the corner and a small stage to round out the amenities.
One of the drink specials was 2 for 1 vodka Red Bulls. Each of us would buy a round of four drinks, the extra going to the person who bought the round. Mike bought the first to get us going before the crowd became unmanageable. There was a group of ladies near where we stood and one of them was celebrating her 21st birthday. We were surprised to learn one of the women in the group was her aunt. Rob bought the next round and we encourage him to give the extra drink to the birthday girl. I then bought the next round.
While all this was happening, one of the bartenders got up on the stage and was tasked with exciting the crowd. She would shout, cajole, and insult anyone who caught her eye. I eventually became a victim when she started a contest with the punching bag. I was volunteer number one and my limp-wristed punch did not set the bar high. I tried to slink away, but I was required to take a shot; the shot being administered by pouring it from the bottle directly into my mouth. Whether by awkward positioning or inadequate timing, the bartender banged the metal top against my tooth, chipping it. The ironic part was this tooth was chipped before and I just had it repaired a couple weeks prior to the trip. The chipped tooth was the last in a series of dentist visits I had going back a couple months. I had more things jammed in my mouth during that period than Linda Lovelace.
Luckily, I wasn’t the only one who made a fool of myself that night, at Coyote Ugly or elsewhere (more on that later). One of the other competitions the bartender created was a team event. Each team had four players and each player had to flip a plastic cup sitting upside down on the edge of the stage so that it stood right side up. Once a player was successful, the next player stepped in. The first team to get all four players to do it won. I can’t remember if the shots were for the winners as a reward or for the losers as punishment. Rob and Mike were on one team. Rob was the first of the two to try it and he took a while to finally get the cup to land right. Mike was the anchor of the team and he utterly failed. Unfortunately, there was no hole for us to crawl into.
Fortunately, we didn’t have to linger in defeat. The night had gotten away from us and we had just a short time to get over to the Paris to watch Anthony Cools. Overall, we were having a good time and wanted to come back, but we didn’t want to wait in line and pay a cover. Rob checked with a bouncer, and since we already had our hands stamped, we could walk right in when we returned. Encouraged by that news, we hustled downstairs to get to the Paris in time for the show.
Day Four (Part 1) Expenses
Beer at Monte Carlo Foam Party - $5.00
Vodka Red Bull round at Coyote Ugly - $20.00 (estimated, no receipt)
*
Day Four (Part 1) Total: $25.00
Running Total: $1,542.16
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