Real Men of Genius

Voiceover (singing):  Real Men of Genius!

Announcer:  Today we salute you, Mr. Two Day Propane Grill Builder

Voiceover (singing):  Mr. Two Day Propane Grill Builder!

Announcer:  After several months of your box of grill parts sitting in the garage, your wife hints heavily she would like to cook outside once before summer ends.

Voiceover (singing):  You can’t put her off forever.

Announcer:  That empty feeling in your gut isn’t the anticipation of grilled burgers, steaks, and salmon.  It’s the realization the instruction manual is the size of a phone book.

Voiceover:  Your story will be better without exaggerations!

Announcer:  After two hours of sweat-soaked effort, you decide to stop for the day once you realize the left and right leg brackets are assembled on the wrong side.  You go from Step 10 back to Step 6.

Voiceover (singing):  It’s like playing a game of ‘Chutes and Ladders!’

Announcer:  After four hours over two days in 90 degree heat with 70 percent humidity and damaging only one part in an expletive-filled tirade, you finally have a working propane grill.  At least, you hope it’s working.

Voiceover (singing):  Better have the wife use it first.

Announcer:  Go ahead and crack open an ice cold Bud Light, Mr. Fix-It .  Then you can decide how you are going to get that broken light bulb out of the socket without hurting yourself. 

Voiceover (singing):  Mr. Two Day Propane Grill Builder.